Monday, February 23, 2009

I Want Beef Jerky!

I can't stop laughing at this little girl...or posing Gary and yelling things like "MAGIC!".







(Sorry, Chris.)

Saturday, February 21, 2009

How very Jack Nicholson of me.


I got this from Julie. Well...actually I stole it from Julie's blog.

I was horrified that she had never been to the top of the STL Arch and I informed her that we would be making a trip to STL sometime this year to do just that...and go to the zoo...and a Cardinals game. Other than those things, I really can't think of other stuff that is oh-so St. Louis. 

Well...maybe get mugged, but no one actually wants that to happen. 

Here's my bucket list (that someone else made up, which I guess isn't really the point of a "bucket list")...


Things you have done during your lifetime:
(x) Gone on a blind date
(x) Skipped school
(x) Watched someone die
(x) Been to Canada
(x) Been to Mexico
(x) Been to Florida
( ) Been to Hawaii
(x) Been on a plane
(x)Been on a helicopter
(x) Been lost
( ) Gone to Washington, DC
(x) Swam in the ocean
(x) Cried yourself to sleep
(x) Played cops and robbers
(x) Recently colored with crayons
(x) Sang Karaoke - including back up singing
(x) Paid for a meal with coins only
(x) Been to the top of the St. Louis Arch
(x) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't.
(x) Made prank phone calls
( ) Been down Bourbon Street in New Orleans
(x) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose & elsewhere
(x) Caught a snowflake on your tongue
(x) Danced in the rain
(x) Written a letter to Santa Claus
(x) Been kissed under the mistletoe
(x) Watched the sunrise with someone
(x) Blown bubbles
(x) Gone ice-skating
(x) Gone to the movies
( ) Been deep sea fishing
(x) Driven across the United States
( ) Been in a hot air balloon
( ) Been sky diving
( ) Gone snowmobiling
( ) Lived in more than one country
(x) Lay down outside at night and admired the stars while listening to the crickets
(x) Seen a falling star and made a wish
( ) Enjoyed the beauty of Old Faithful Geyser
(x) Seen the Statue of Liberty
( ) Gone to the top of Seattle Space Needle
( ) Been on a cruise
(x) Traveled by train
(x) Traveled by motorcycle
(x) Been horse back riding
( ) Ridden on a San Francisco CABLE CAR
( ) Been to Disneyland or DisneyWorld
(x) Truly believe in the power of prayer
( ) Been in a rain forest
( ) Seen whales in the ocean
(x) Been to Niagara Falls
(x) Ridden on an elephant
( ) Swam with dolphins
( ) Been to the Olympics
( ) Walked on the Great Wall of China
( ) Saw and heard a glacier calf
( ) Been spinnaker flying
( ) Been water-skiing
( ) Been snow-skiing
( ) Been to Westminster Abbey
( ) Been to the Louvre
( ) Swam in the Mediterranean
(x) Been to a Major League Baseball game
(x) Been to a National Football League game
( ) Found and lost the greatest love of your life
(x) Kissed a total stranger
( ) Raced another car


Wow. What a wide range of randomness that was....

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Soaked.

I have very rarely carried an umbrella. I really don't see the point, it's not like a little bit of rain can hurt you and and umbrella tends to just get in the way. Not to forget the fact that getting into my car with an open umbrella seems to get me more drenched than just a quick run to my car sans umbrella would get me. Well, this theory only works when there isn't a freaking monsoon outside.

I really didn't want to leave the house this evening, but as I was changing into my comfy clothes (yes, the Adidas track pants and hideous red pullover), I remembered that I was put in charge of getting a coworker's bridal shower gift. I figured it would be a quick trip to Target, so I just put on my flippies (aka: flip-flops, sandals, or (if you're really retro) thongs...) and ran out the door. Let me first say that when I left, it wasn't even sprinkling.

As I pulled into the parking lot (which is about half the size that it used to be, thanks to all of the construction going on), I saw that someone was pulling out of a spot right next to the door. I was stoked and waited patiently. Waited, waited....and then almost LOST it (alright, I lost it a little bit...okay, a lot...) when some stupid man pulled around the corner and pulled into the spot before I could get to it. Deep breaths....DEEEEEEEEEP breaths....

I found another spot at the far end of the parking lot, which was fine. I could use the exercise....or something like that.

You know those people that look at a gift registry and buy the cheapest thing on it (utensils and whatnot)??? I hate those people. So...I became the person that EVERYONE hates. I bought every cheap item on the list. Could I have just bought one large item?? Of course. Did I want to? No. I want to be that girl that gives 542 utensils, darnit!

As I am checking out (and the cashier is eyeballin' me with all of the gift-registry judgment she can muster...), we hear a loud crash of thunder. I was convinced that it was a a car wreck outside. It was not.

I walk towards the door with my bags and bags of cheap utensils and Diet Coke to find an insane downpour....and an angel of a woman. She looks at me, then looks at my cart and then looks back at me and says, "Honey, you take my umbrella. I promise...I'm very trustworthy. Go get your car and pull it around, I'll watch your stuff."
Since I was in no position to argue (remember...a MAN took my close parking spot), I took her purple umbrella and made my way to my car. Of course, once I got to my car, I had an issue closing the umbrella and managed to soak the inside of my car...and my legs....and my jacket...and my head. I pulled my car around, and thanked the woman for being so kind. And then sat in my car for a moment and realized that I had standing water in my new car.

It was raining SO HARD that I now have STANDING WATER in my car!

So, just to be clear...
1. I'm waiting for the rain to stop to go outside and try to soak up the water in my car.
2. Women are nice.
3. Men may be better drivers, but they can many times be complete douche bags while driving.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

It's disgusting.

So it's been awhile since I've blogged and my mom is worried.  Well, she was worried...until she called to see why I hadn't blogged in a couple weeks. I explained to her that I was going to blog about this thing, but every time I would start it, I would throw up in my mouth.

So while I have an empty stomach, I am going to forge ahead and get through this story (I'm going to make it as short as possible, you know...as to not puke).

About a week and a half ago, I was all alone at work (just the tiniest bit stressed). I was exhausted and dramatically put my left hand down on my desk. Post-putting my hand down on my desk, I then turned into a teenager in high school and propped my head up...only to quickly pull it away.

Why did I pull my hand so quickly, you ask??

Well, my dear blog-reader, I pulled my hand away quickly because I realized that at that moment I had put disgusting mucus on my face. Someone else's mucus on my face. 

Someone had snotted on my desk....and that snot made it to my face....

You know those slow-motion moments of your life? Many times they are great, but other times...well, they are not so great. When I close my eyes, I still see my slow-motion hand being pulled away from my face and then my fingers being spread to reveal they are still strung together with foreign boogers. 



Needless to say, I went home soon after and took an hour long shower. I then met Thomas out for sushi (not that the sushi part has anything to do with snot). It's sad that Sushi 101 will now forever been linked to boogies in my mind. 

Monday, February 2, 2009

How long?

I'm writing this blog for the main purpose of seeing how long my new computer battery lasts. It's not technically new, just new to me. The Apple store sells a new one for $125. I found one on Ebay for $24.99. If the thing can hold a charge for 2 hours, I'm going to be pleased. Of course...it's been about 5 minutes and I'm at 95%. So, I may be just 20 minutes short of my goal. Oh, well...that's still better than the battery being drained in 3 minutes. Go me!

Now I just need to figure out what to write about.
AH! I'll switch it up a bit. I'm always giving a play-by-play of the weekend, maybe this time I'll go backwards. I'm a huge fan of breaking the rules (or something like that).

Today:
Ugh. I'm gross. I woke up this morning and stumbled into work, pretty much just to unlock the doors and walk back out 30 minutes later. I'm making it very clear that I'm blaming Dr. Dunlop for all of this. He came into work sick last week, complaining that it would cost him $2500 if he had to hire someone to take his place for a day. Really? $2500 a day?? Sucks to be you, Dr. D....sucks to be you.
I spent the day curled up on the couch, watching stupid daytime TV. BTW...Kathy Lee Gifford is an idiot. She was interviewing a man from the advertising agency Deutsch Inc. and she did the lead in pronouncing it "douche". Did she not think that it might be somewhat offensive to call someone a douche on live TV? If that wasn't bad enough, she did her uber-annoying eye roll/lip lick combo. And then talked about Cassidy and Cody. Okay, okay...maybe she didn't talk about her kids (are they in college yet??), but she did annoy me with her face.
Point: I didn't do much today. Although, after my 3 hour nap and 2 hour bath, I am feeling a bit better. I'm quite sure I'll be back to work tomorrow.

Yesterday:
I had written on my last blog that I was going to do on Sunday what I do every Sunday (eat breakfast and be happy). Unfortunately, I had forgotten to add the Super Bowl into my equation. So, I slept in, took a bath, went to the Teet, and headed over to the Fisicaro's for some football watchin' fun with some of my best pals. It was...ummm.....yummy. There was some seriously delicious grub everywhere. I'm thinking that maybe we should pretend that it's the Super Bowl every week. What do you say??? Championship bowling is on ESPN2??? Bring on the buffalo wing dip!! Huh? The WNBA is playing somewhere (and is definitely never going to be on TV)?? We must grill some meat immediately and imagine that we care about the game! Oh...who am I kidding? I don't know anyone who can even pretend that they care about the WNBA.

Saturday:
I woke up pretty late and bathed for about 4 hours. I've been reading a book (that is around the same size as War and Peace) and there is nothing better than reading in the bathtub.
Around 4:30, I realized that maybe I should get ready and head over to C's. We made our way down to the new Wild Wing Cafe at the Epicentre around 7:30 and waited half an hour for a table. It actually worked out pretty well since Kim and Jimmy were half an hour late and got there about 2 minutes after we were sat. After having my way with those scrumptious mini cheeseburgers (and skipping over the non-Patti Labelle macaroni and cheese), we went to the comfiest movie theater ever to see Gran Torino. It was a little weird that people could eat steak while watching a movie, but still...I thoroughly enjoyed it.
After the movie, Chris and I set out to find his car (because I had worn the most uncomfortable shoes and wanted to change them). It only took about 38 minutes. Yeah...maybe it was my fault. Maybe I did say that we were parked in section P5 and maybe section P5 doesn't exist. SO?!?! Exercise in 4 inch heels is important, people!
Once we found the car (I say "we", but I mean "Chris"), we moved it to a parking spot closer to the stairwell. At least that way we didn't really have to remember where it was after our next excursion out of the parking garage.
We finally made it to Blackfin, had a few drinks, and managed to close the place out. I think I fell asleep around 4am. It was lovely.

Friday:
After work, I met the crew downtown at The Graduate for some bar-type dinner and some improv fun. After the improv show (where I learned that my friends have a wild imagination), we went to Thomas Street Tavern. Around midnight, Sam, Brian, Chris, Thomas, and I went to the Fisicaro's house (Julie and Laura had gotten bored with us about an hour earlier). Of course, I had to stop by my house first to change out of my smoky clothes and into my quilty pj pants. Did it hurt my feelings when someone (I'm not naming any names) asked, "What are you wearing??"
No. It did not. Well, okay. Maybe a little bit. I don't care....they are crazy comfortable (see below...don't they just LOOK crazy comfortable??). At least he (or she) didn't tell me the next day never to wear them again. :)
I went home around 4am and was thanking God the whole way home that I live only a mile from Sam's. If I didn't, I definitely would have been sleeping on the couch that night...

Well, between setting the computer down to field some work questions/texts and pseudo-watching old episodes of How I Met Your Mother on Lifetime...it has now been an hour and forty minutes and I am now out of battery. Not bad, cheap battery, not bad...