Sunday, February 28, 2010

The Boy That I Drew In My Head

Beth dropped a knowledge bomb atop my head about a week ago. It was a lesson that she had learned awhile back and she was kind enough to pass this bit of verbal gold along to me.

Not to get too into everything, but the gist of it was that when you get upset at someone, you have to figure out if you are mad at the person or you're mad at the person that you think they should be in your head. Did the person fail you or did the person that you created fail you? More often than not, it will be that you're upset because the person failed to live up to what you imagined that they could be.

While this piece of advice rang very true, it was cemented in my mind by a song that I kept listening to this week. As I've already written, I've become rather obsessed with Steve Moakler as of late. He has a song called "Boy That You Drew" that I think was written from the perspective of every person that I've ever made up in my mind.

How many times have you wanted to say to someone, "I'm sure to disappoint you; I'm not the boy that you drew in your head."?? Okay, maybe I'm the only one, but how brutal is it to try and fail to live up to others expectations when you did nothing to ask for the role that they have cast you in? How many times have you cast someone in role of "perfect human being"? How many times have you felt let down because you chose that role for someone else?

There is no person that can be everything that you want them to be. It's an impossible burden to put onto someone.

Hopefully, by me being more conscience of this, I will be able to look at my friends and family as they are: flawed, but still unbelievably wonderful people that I am absolutely blessed to have in my life.

(PS...Don't thank me for this egg of knowledge that has just been cracked on your head, thank Beth...and Steve Moakler. I think they may be geniuses.)

1 comment:

Julie said...

I'm definitely guilty of doing this to guys in past relationship. The hard part is when you don't even realize you're trying to shove them into the peg you've formed until it's too late.

Is it weird that I'm commenting on your blog whilest sitting next to you on the couch? :)